He really was bad-and not in a good way

Ok as everyone knows by now Michael Jackson passed away last week, Did i want him to die? No. Am i all of a sudden going to change my tune and start saying that he was awesome? Uh uh. I wasn't a fan not even in the Thriller days when he was still black with a real nose. That being said i will list the few cool things i can think of having to do with the king of pop.

1) wouldnt have had a cool dance scene in the movie Clerks 2 without ABC by the Jackson five. Not sure MJ would have enjoyed Rosario Dawson jiggling in time to the music. Maybe if it was Webster. Yes i went there. And come on it had Jay and Silent Bob in pig tails lip syncing as well. Classic.

2} "Mattie Thriller!"--the cool Thriller dance scene in 13 going on 30 with Jennifer Garner. Although he was a prick and refused to let the song be on the soundtrack. Ok i will admit the original Thriller video was ok. Would have been awesome if he hadnt been in it.

3} He gave Sheryl Crow her first professional break. She was the back up singer on his Bad tour.

4} We wouldnt have gotten the Weird Al classics Eat it and Fat.

5) The song We are The World. It was for a great cause and it featured a lot of my favorite singers including Bruce Springsteen and Huey Lewis

3}the classic "Lisa its your birthday" song on the Simpsons. He also played a fat white bald man on the same episode

And thats about it. I still think he was a freak and will not change my opinion even though he is dead.

Now enjoy a bunch of pics that don't feature Michael Jackson

The end.

Mickey the gun toting, dirty dancing, pimp mouse

Hello friends. Just sitting here on Sunday. Diana is watching a Superman cartoon and Kath is napping. She's getting her rest because we're going to the drive in tonight. Going to see Up and Land of The Lost. Diana is really excited. I hopre that feeling lasts because last year we took her to see Kung Fu Panda and all she wanted to do was leave. This time she picked out her own snacks and says she cant wait to go. Should be cool. Plus you can't go wrong with Will Ferrell yelling at dinosaurs.

So here's the moment i know you have all been waiting for. The weekly "Jay bitches about the Saturday shift." Talked to some real winners yesterday. One guy was mad because i couldnt tell him which channel was the "everybody Loves Raymond" channel. Beats me. Is there a channel that plays nothing but Everybody Loves Raymond? That would be sad. On another call it sounded like someone was bopping their baloney. I kept hearing squishy sounds. It was kind of gross. Wasnt a fan. Are you curious about what cartoon was played on the big wall this week? It was the most f'ed up bunch of Mickey Mouse short cartoons ever. Here are a few of the things i saw--no joke.

1} In one scene Minnie Mouse was dancing around in a bra. I kid you not. She was dancing with Mickey Mouse who was wearing a big pimp hat with a feather in it. Oh and they were dirty Dancing together.

2} Later on in the same short this big fat dog guy grabbed Minnie,stuffed her in a bag and rode off. Later on Mickey saved her by stabbing the dog in the ass with a sword and cutting his pants off.

3) in the next short Donald Duck was playing the flute. Apparently he was bad because Mickey Mouse was really pissed off. He kept breaking Donalds flute and i think pulled a gun on him.

4) Mickey hit a button on a wall and a white liquid shot all over Donald. Next.

5) An elephant grabbed Pluto by the tail and pulled his butt into the air and then stared at his Pluto ass.

6) Donald was fighting little fire creatures that were walking around. oh and Pluto was dressed like the devil? So the Disney gang was in hell? Thats a lovely cartoon for children.

Thats all i can remember for the time being. It could have been worse. I thought for sure they were going to play Michael Jackson videos all day.


So actually its now Monday. Gonna finish up the blog i started yesterday. The drive in was awesome. It was pouring all the way there but it stopped right before the movies started. Up was a great movie. As far as Pixar movies go i would rank it up there with Wal-e and The Incredibles. Stupid movie made me tear up a bunch of times though. Diana loved it. She stayed quiet the whole time. She was even quiet for most of Land Of the Lost. She rocks!! Work sucked today as usual. What re you gonna do? Anyhow gonna go eat dinner and hang out with the fan. Talk tou you all later!

Not even the good kind of weed

So i pulled out all the tall weeds in my back yard. What do you think i found? A whole mouse colony!! Nah I'm kidding. I found nothing. Big friggin' surprise. I'm sorry my neighbor found a rodent in his home but screw him if he thinks they're from our yard. Weed pulling was great. I sweat a lot and felt like i was going to have a heart attack. Good times!

Other than that the day was pretty good. Spent the whole day with the family and showed Kath how to play lego Indy. She is also addicted to the game. We did a bit of shopping tonight. We hit the bulk barn and Walmart and Best Buy. By the way Best Buy is not the Best Buy. They are damn liars. All their movies are ridiculously overpriced. Season 4 of Stargate Atlantis is almost 50 bucks. The same set at Walmart was under 20 bucks. I'll probably pick it up next paycheck.

Tried to watch some movies tonight. Put on Leatherheads and Kath fell asleep. Then i put Hellboy 2 on and i fell asleep. Kooky. Well better get to bed i have a whole day of not pulling weeds ahead of me. Cheers!

cups ,comics, Nickle and Rob

Well here it is 1:48 in the a m. The day was pretty good once work ended. Work was very tiring today. I seemed to have to over simplify everything i said to the customers, Nobody understood what i was saying no matter how much i dumbed things down. It sucked. One cool thing happenned. My friend Deb is sitting beside me again so i can at least joke a ittle bit again. Thank goodness for little things. What wasnt cool? The fact that an old lady made me tell her the titles of the porn that was ordered on her cable box. I'm sorry but was it really necessary to tell you that Big Black asses was ordered? Awkward.

After work we went downtown to the comic book store. St Paul street has now become a 2 way street. That seems a little f'ed up to me. Its all been one way for my whole life. I expect to hear about some accidents any day now. We then took a visit to 7 11. They now have Transformers slurpee cups. As you all know i have a weird facination with movie tie in cups. So we got a couple of those and headed home. We had some dinner and watched some tv. I bitched a bit about the weeding i have to do tomorrow. Rob and Nickle came by for a visit. We shot the breeze for a bit. Talked a bit about the upcoming comic book convention, Leonard Nimoy has been added to the guest list. Should be awesome.

So I'm getting old. Yesterday i found out that John Mellencamp released a new album. Why does this mean I'm getting old? Not only am i a huge fan but since 1983 I've known ahead of time the release date of each of his albums. Until now. Back in 1983 we didnt even have the internet for upcoming cd releases. Slipping up in my old age. Oh well. I should be getting to sleep but in addition to blogging i feel the need to view videos on you tube by such 80'c Canadian bands as Rock and Hyde and the Box. Thats a good reason to not sleep. Oh well. Signing off. Have a good night. Need my energy to weed tomorrow, Yay me! Wait maybe i won't be going to sleep just yet. This "hits of the 70's" infomercial featuring Tony Orlando is awesome. Man Cat Stevens had a big ass beard.

Flat tires, asshole customers, mind numbing cramps and mice

Man am i glad today is over. What a shitty day. It started off bad. I got to work and all of a sudden felt like i got kicked in the stomach hard. Without sounding gross i had to use the facilities. I usually don't take personal breaks and i didnt especially want to take one 15 minutes after i arrived. I tried to hold out but i began to lose my concentration. I extended a guys bill due date in a market where i'm not suppossed to. My manager passed me a note saying i shouldnt have done that. With that i took a personal break. We're only allowed a 5 minute personal a day. I ended up needing 8 minutes. Didnt think it would be a big deal becasue i never use the personal time. I got back and my supervisor was waiting at my desk and had logged me off of my phone. You'd think i killed a drifter or something.

The day got worse, It all of a sudden started geting super busy. An old lady started yelling at me because i refused to credit her service until the end of July. Her phone wasnt working and she hadnt spoken to a technician yet. I said i would credit her until todays date-june 23rd which was being generous as she hadnt called us in 14 days to report an issue. She started screaming at me. I told her i couldnt credit her into the future as we didnt know what date service would work again. She wanted a supervisor and if he wouldnt credit her she would need the president of the company. I was told to shut my mouth when i mentioned i couldnt get her our president. She hung up.

THen the day got stranger. I was leaving work to come home for lunch. As i was crossing the street a tow truck started honking at me.I looked up and Kath was in a tow truck. Then i noticed our van in the back of the truck.Oh crap now what? I immediately started to fear the worst. What was wrong with the van? Were we going to have to use our rent money for repairs? Turns out it was just a flat tire. But i wouldnt know that for a few hours. I was relieved when i found out everyone was ok.

Also when i was at home my neighbor the Dark Knight asked me if I've seen any mice. He had seen a mouse on his property. I have not seen a mouse. He started telling me i should weed my backyard becasue maybe mice were living amongst the weeds. I admit i have some weeds and i havent had time to pull them. Its not like theres a jungle out back or anything and i havent seen an army of mice back there. I guess I'm weeding on my day off. Hurray!


If working a ten hour shift wasnt enough,i had to go to a stupid meeting for my complex. Was given the awesome news that my rent is going up. The meeting should have been over quickly but 4 of my neighbors kept bitching about everything. It was annoying and wasnt in the mood to drag things out. It was a terryble experience. Thank God it happens only once a year.


So the day is done and its time to go to sleep. One more day of hell then its 2 days of peace. Oh and weeding,musnt forget the weeding. At least my day is ending cool. Just heard the new Wallflowers single. I ordered it off of I tunes as i dont feel like shelling out the cash for their greatest hits cd. I already have all their albums and theres only one new song on it. Kick ass song though. Also downloaded the Transformers theme as performed by Cheap Trick. Good times! Have a great night folks. Talk to you soon.

The happy father

Hey folks. Happy fathers day to all the dads out there. I'm really happy to be a father. Its the thing I'm most proudest of. I've said it many times but Diana wasnt planned but my life wouldnt be as happy without her in my life. Everyday she finds new ways to make me happy. She's the best. And because I'm a father I'm a total cry baby now. When i hear any kind of sad story about a kid wheter its a movie or real life i will tear up. Its happenned at work before. I love Diana a lot and want to be here for her as long as i can.


Fathers day is going pretty good. Diana gave me a nice card and a Bubmlebee from thr Transformers Mr Potato Head. We have a mini collection of Mr Potatoe heads-characters ranging from Darth Vader to Soiderman to Indiana Jones. As a matter of fact i cleaned off the fire place downstairs and set them all up today. While downstairs i hung up a few action figures that still needed to be put up. I also did laundry and cleaned up some cat vomit. Good times. I cleaned up the cats litter and fed them as well. Hey i have to be a good daddy to them as well. Oh well. Talk to you soon

Lego Indy I love you

Well its official, I'm hooked to the video game lego Indiana Jones. I can't stop playing it. I'm even dreaming about it now, Earlier this year we got a wii system. It was a cool purchase. Got some sports games with it. Didnt really want to make the time to play it between work and watching tv. We got the Indy game a few weeks ago and i'm seriously addicted. Evry free minute i get goes towards playing the game. Whats not to love about it? Its based on my favorite movie series of all time. The music in the game is right from the movie. Its awesome. I havent been this addicted to video games since the old going to the arcade days.Those were fun days. Ok time for some fresh air, no more game until Diana goes to bed.

Suns Gonna Rise Again

Wow. We might actually get to make it to a concert this year. Just found out that Sass Jordan is playing a little bar/restaurant called Hugh's Room in September. We've been there a couple times in the past and its a really cool small venue to catch a show. Not only is it probably going to be an acoustic show which is very cool but its also a cd release party. Very cool. You know its awesome news when Jay can't stop saying the word "cool." I've been a fan of her's since her first album in 1988. Yes long before she was known as that judge from Canadian Idol. Kath and i have seen her a few times. We actually got to meet her after the last show. She was really nice and thought Diana looked like me. Can't wait to go in September. I already booked a whole week off from work which is something I've never done. I had a lot of vacation days coming to me. Turns out that its Diana's first week of school as well. I get to walk her all week. The week before that is the comic book convention. Is it wrong that i wish we could just skip ahead to the end of the summer?

Hanging out with the Yamster

Wow haven't blogged in almost a week. I havent really had anything interesting to say. I still don't. Be prepared to be bored beyond relief. I have today off. Not used to having a Saturday off. I originally booked today off to walk in the relay for life with Kath. Two reasons prevented us from doing that. Kath's knee has been acting up and her work decided to book her to work on her first saturday in a million years. There was no way she was gonna work til 9 the week before, walk all night and then go back at 1 the next day. It sucks because i was looking forward to spending the day with her. Oh well. Oh and still no word on a passport so Kath and Nickle are going to the states again minus me. The good news is i think i can get a passport in July as theres 3 pay checks that month! A whoo hoo!

Work was brutal this week. I kept it together though. One ridiculous call stands out in my mind. A customer called in wanting to know the telephone number for an insurance company he saw advertised on some show he had watched a week before. He couldnt get it through his head that i would have no way of finding information on a commercial that some channel ran. I tried to tell him we don't choose the programming never mind the commercials. I think he threatened to cancel service because of this. Crazy. Man i love my job.

The days off have been good so far. Diana and i checked out the park and walked to the grocery store yesterday. She was such a good girl that i took her to macdonalds for a "pink berry" sundae. It was a nice walk and she'ds really good at looking both ways before she crosses the street. Not sure if she got that from me or from watching cartoons. Anyhow going to go enjoy some breakfast. I may be back later to post some more. Have a nice day despite the rain.

Its The Little Things that make jay happy

Wow Sunday is starting off pretty awesome! I just found out i lost 9 pounds in 3 weeks! Thats awesome for me. Just 2 more pounds and I'm down to my beginning of summer 2008 weight. I really want to lose 20 pounds in total. That is my goal. After that who knows. I just want to fit into old concert t shirts is that so wrong?


So here's another thing making me happy-and yes i know its a dumb thing to be happy about . So I'm a big fan of a Canadian singer named Kim Stockwood. In the late 90's she had a couple of solo albums and more recently she has been in a band called Shaye. She's really cool and Kath and i have been lucky to see her in concert a bunch of times-solo and with the band. Anyhow she has a music video called "you Won't Remember this." Yes its about drinking, Anyhow it came out way back in 1997. Try as i may I've never been able to see that video. I've seen clips of it on tv but thats about it. Well today while perusing you tube i finally came across it!! The search was over! Hooray! It was just as cool as i imagined it!! I think i watched it about 5 times now. Like the title of this blog suggests-its the little things that make Jay happy!

Also happy due to the fact i only have to work 3 days this week. I have next Saturday off. It pains me that i will miss the crappy cartoon of the week next week. I think I'll get over it though. I don't even know what i was watching yesterday. It was a black and white cartoon with a fat guy in a black vest and crown. Anyhow the reason I'm off next Saturday-Kath's workplace is having a walk for cancer called the relay for life. A bunch of her co workers are going to a track to walk all night Friday night. Kath did it last year as well. So yammy and i are going out to support her and Nickle this year. Should be fun.

Man not sure what is going down in our complex today. There was an ambulance here and 2 police cars. I spotted all this while Yammy and i were headed to the park. Crazy.

Can't wait for Kath to get home tonight. Gonna have a bunch of bacon and atkins friendly pancakes.Ah the little cool things.

Just a tiny bit tired today. Stayed up late last night watching Rocky Balboa. I didnt expect to like it as much as i did. I`m glad this was the final chapter of Rocky and not that craptastic Rocky 5. You remember that one. THe plot was hey Rocky if you fiht again you will die. So what does he do. Thats right fights. Rocky Balboa was pretty good and even found myself tearing up a couple times. Oh and Peter Petrelli was in it. Good times.

Well gonna go lay on the couch with Diana and watch Iron man and Batman team up. If anything interesting happens i`ll write again later. Take care everybody.

Even in the midst of a horrible day the Yamster makes me smile

Just got back from the park with Diana. She was kicking the ball around and yelling "I'm number one at soccer! I never lose. And daddy is number 2!" She was running around like a little pro. Did a little bike riding today as well. She only wanted to try for a few minutes though. Can't say as i blame her as its pretty hot out there today. Like an oven. An oven i tell ya. The window installers got here first thing this morning. Yay for me! I love getting up early on my days off. It rules! They just finally completely finnished up. At 4:30. At least i had the kid here making me laugh today. I guess no matter how i look at it its better than being at work today. Can I get an amen.

Hey i just gotta say this Atkins diet isnt that bad. Sure i miss pizza and cake but Kath is finding all kinds of new kick ass recipes. Just enjoying an Atkins version of Sheppards pie. I think we ned to make a trip to Avondale to see if they have low carb ice cream again. That would be cool. Anyhow I`m kind of rambling now so gonna let Diana get on here and play her princess games. Hope all my friends are awesome.Rob i hope you got chicken the other night, Anyhow have an awesome day. I`m sure i`ll have more to complain about after work tomorrow. Take care.

The not as fat as he was 2 weeks ago hero of work.

Wow yesterday i was a hero at work. As mentioned earlier i got a 95 percent when the client listened in to my call. Yesterday every manager was coming up to me congragulating me, high fiving me and telling me how awesome i was. It was pretty sweet. It was like i was a rock star. It kind of made up for the rest of my shitty day. I'm still acting nice to everyone. Its kind of hard when i have senior citizens calling me an asshole as they hang up the phone. Thats right someone who may have been 100 years old said what an asshole as she was hanging up the phone. Oh and funniest porn title of the day? Three hole implosion. Man i love my job.


So this is the part where i talk about how awesome Kathy, Rachel and Nicole are. So i decided that after work yesterday i would walk to the comic book store downtown. I felt i could do it. I had an hour after work to get there. Wasnt sure when we would get there this week and a walk wouldnt hurt me as i am trying to lose some weight. SO at lunch i messaged Kath and told her of my plan. I didnt hear back so i figured she hadnt gotten the message. No problem. I actually got out of work 12 minutes early. Cool extra time to get there. I came home. Messaged Kath again. Still no response. Oh well. A walk will be cool. So i started off through the parking lot and immediately ran into Rachel who asked me if i wanted a ride. I said yes to her offer. When we got downtown she decided to wait for me, She is really nice. So i went into the store and went to pay for my books. By the way this was the first week there was a bag for Diana Stewart. I was proud. Little known fact if you try to pay with a bank card you havent used in 2 or 3 years-its not going to work and will come up as cancelled. Yeah i was a little embarrassed. Oh well. So left the books and got back into Rachels van. Oh well i would at least still beat Kathy home. So we were almost all the way home and all of a sudden Rach turns the van around. What was going on? It seems they had just passed Kath heading for downtown. I felt like an idiot. Hadnt counted on Kath getting home early and certainly didnt count on Rach following her,. We caught up to Kath and started honking. Kath didnt hear us. Finally got back to the comic book store and met Kath there. It seems she had also gotten off work early. She had actually gotten my messages and had already been to my work and home and had already been to the comic store once.Yes i felt really really bad,. Everyone was cool about what had happenned.I managed to get some books after all. When we got home Nickle was sitting here waiting for us. Yes i also felt bad for making her wait. Altough i had no idea she was coming over. Anyhow appologies to my wife and friends and sorry I'm such a dork.


This brings us to today. I'm enjoying day one of time off from the job. I woke up a bit early becasue I am still expecting some workers over to replace our windows. They probably wont get here until tomorrow morning. Rach says it takes them a little over an hour to do the job. Thats alright i guess. So stepped on the scale and I'm down anothr pound and a half on my diet. So that makes 7 and a half pounds lost in 2 weks. Not bad. That leaves about another 14 pounds until my goal. Kath is doing pretty good on her diet as well. She actually does the wii exercise everynight. I'm so proud of her.

Just waiting on the laundry to be done. I have no clean pants. I want to take Yammy to the park but can't go without pants. Well i could but probably just the one time.

Well the window guys have been next door for over 2 hours. Yay. I'm stuck here until they get here and do the job. If they arent here today then they will probably be here at 8:30 tomorrow morning. What a waste of a couple days off. I actually watched a whole movie while sitting here waiting. A gem of a 1984 movie called Buckaroo Banzai: adventures across the 8th dimension. Good stuff. Nothing like a rock star/brain surgeon who fights aliens with Jeff Goldblum. Anyhow I'm gonna go back to waiting. Hope everyone is having an awesome Thursday. Friggin window installers. Talk to you soon.

Adventures of a drunken karaokee sensation

Well today at work another drunken night came to mind. Prepare yourself for the tale of Jay's Karaokee contest adventure.

This story i think took place in the winter of 1997. So there was a huge Karaokee contest. There was about 10 bars involved. For four weeks at each bar 3 winners were picked and would advance to a city wide contest. The catch was you had to sing country music. Ugh. Some country is ok but nothing i wanted to be singing in a contest.Anyhow on the final night of the pre competion at a bar in Thorold south-i can't remember the name of the bar i actually sang 2 country songs. One was a Dwight yoakum song which borderline rocked. The secong was a tune that Billy Joel had originally done called Shameless. It was later done by Garth Brooks. I knew the song by heart and didnt even need to look at the words on the screen. I pretty much copied all of Billy Joel's moves from the video. I had never even heard the Garth Brooks version. At one point i fell down on my knees in front of a female friend. Much like Mr Joel did. So long story short at the end of the night i placed! I made it to the big city wide contest. I got myself a nifty fake medal. It was very olympic like. What made the victory even better was i beat out my ex girlfriend who thought she was hot shit. She was pissed and if i recall correctly she even threw a chair.

So a couple of weeks go by until the big contest. I showed up with a bunch of kfc work friends. We get there and there must have been a billion contestants or so. Guess who was last in the order? Yup thats right. Me! I was so nervous because everyone there was awesome and even liked country music. So back in those days what did i do when i was nervous? Thats right drink heavily. By the time i got up to do my first song i was half in the bag. By the time i got to do my second song? Lets just say I'm told i almost fell off the stage. I must have passed out because i came to,i was lying on a table and the lights were on. What was the first thing out of my mouth?
"so did i win or what?"

Needless to say i did not.

On a side note apparently being drunk in a karaokee contest makes me more attractive to women. One of my co workers who i was there with told me she thought i was attractive and that we should hook up--no strings attached. Here's the thing, although i would have thought that would be cool,we both never talked about it again or brought it up. Also a girl i went to high school with was there as well. She said to me. "oooh you're hot....now." This implied that she thought i was a little unattractive nerd in high school but was really really good looking now. At the time i had an awesome mullet so i guess she was right.

I'm not sure where i was going with this story. As with most tales of my past it just popped into my head while trying to grin and bear the red necks at work. Oh young Jay with the mullet you were such a drunken scamp.

Go buy a tv guide asshole

Well i made it alive through a horrible Tuesday shift. The customers were more brutal than ever. I gave one lady her balance,she called me a dickhead and hung up. I seriously put up with a tremendous ammount of bullshit today. I never lost it once. Here's a call that made me chuckle.

customer: I want to know what chanel Sheppards Chappel is on.

Me: Sorry sir i don't have access to any programming.

Cust:what am i suppossed to do?

Me: try a tv guide or the tv guide channel or tvguide.com.

cust: but another rep was able to tell me what channel tbs was

Me: well we have access to the channel listings but i couldnt tell you what each channel is playing. We're not in charge of the programming.

cust : who is?

me : the programmers.

cust : but why could the other rep tell me where tbs is?

me:its 2 different things telling you whee tbs is and what the channel is playing

cust: well where is tbs?

me: I'm sorry i thought the other rep told you

Cust: she did

me :why am i looking it up again then?

cust: to prove a point.

me: I'm sorry what is your point?

cust: that if you can find tbs on the channel line up then you can tell me where to find the show Sheppards Chappel.

And this went on for another 20 minutes. I think he even threatened to cancel service. Its ok though. The client listened in on another of my calls today. I knew it was coming after last week. So i pretended to be nice and it paid off i got a 95 percent on my call. So i guess it pays to suck it up. It was a long day. I seriously feel at times like i don't have a friend in that place. I miss my work friends. Could be worse. I could still be selling coffee to drunks. Ah but thats another tale from the riverbank.

Man I could have been soaking up the sun. Damn you alarm clock!

Here it is the start of a crappy new week. I'm very tired. Its my own fault. Stayed up late watching Tropic Thunder. Very funny movie by the way. Funnier than i thought it would be.

Saturday sucked large as usual. We're still getting cartoons shown for some unknown reason. Hey finally got to see a Bruce Willis movie at work. No it wasnt Die Hard it was Over the Hedge. It was followed by a plethora of Pixar movies. The movies are at least getting better, I still dont give a crap about seeing them at work. I would as pointed out a million and one times earlier still prefer to see my work station instead of working in the dark.

I knew the day was gonna be craptastic. At 7 in the morning i was having the most awesome dream until my stupid alarm clock woke me up. I dreamt i was in Sheryl Crows band and she was in the middle of thanking me on stage during a concert. Stupid alarm clock. I havent been this pissed off to wake up from a dream since the time i dreamt Jennifer Aniston agreed to have relations with me. She was just raising her shirt over her head when the phone rang. It was stupid Sears calling. I never have cool dreams. Why do the cool ones always get interupted? Oh sure i can sleep through the ones where people are shooting at me. Yay me.

Well good news. It seems I'm not going to be written up for my attitude on the phone last Tuesday. Now all i have to do is fake being nice to all customers. Yes even the stupid ones. It has been hard but so far I'm golden. I have had to bite my tongue but all is good. I have been thinking happy thoughts to try and get through the day. Customers swearing at me? No problem i just think about Diana singing her silly songs.

Yesterday was cool. We went to my sisters house for a visit. My sister was kind enought to make me hot dogs. Yay Atkins! I sure miss Pizza. Got to hang out with my nephew. I was trying to sell him on the comic convention this year.

Just got a notice that my landlady is replacing all the living room windows in the complex. Here's the crappy part,it will either be when im not here or i will have to wake up early on my day off. Hooray!

Man i gotta get my passport. Kath and Diana and Nickle went to the States without me to grocery shop on Saturday. I gotta tell you i actually felt left out. It was lonely being here all night by myself. Hell i even missed the arguements Nickle and i would get into whilst shopping. I think I'll be good to go in July. I may only miss out one one more trip. So thats ok. The girls discovered that there is Transformers cups at 7-11. Holy! THree movie cup tie ins in a row. Thats just crazy! They were sold out so we have not gotten any yet. Maybe there will be a Megan Fox cup. Growl.

Anyhow this has been Jay just rambling about anything. Have a great week folks!

Running On Ice at work and gluing with the yamster

Its now Friday, my second day off this week. I'll start this blog out with a shout out to Rob. Sorry if you got the impression i was mad at you for bringing up college the other day. Not at all man. Thats crazy. All you did was ask me about college. No big whoop. Its not like you anally raped my grandmother while dumping sugar into my gas tank. Thanks to Kevin Smith for that line. Just thought i would tell my story of why that experience pissed me off. Its all good. No worries man. You still rock! Thumbs up to you! Or as The Fonz would say, AAYYYYY!

So Wednesday i started my new "customers arent gonna piss me off" attitude. I was nothing but nice to everyone-even the ones that treated me like shit. I credited anything they wanted-even porn and as soon as someone would say i want a supervisor-i immediately transferred to one. I didnt waste my time trying to talk them out of it. Then i found out my supervisor marked me on another call from the day before. Really? The day that i was clearly in a bad mood where i already got pulled into the office for fighting with a customer? Are you serious? You couldnt have marked me on a call the folllowing day where i was the nicest man on earth? Yes i did poorly and yes he marked that i needed to watch my tone with the customer. I have a bad feeling that this one will cause me to get written up. Maybe I'm on thin ice. Who knows. I guess i'll find out on "crappy cartoon" Saturday. Stay tuned. Same Jay time, same Jay channel.


So yesterday we attended Diana's kindergarten open house. It was fun. The teachers are very nice. Diana got to do several activities. Drawing pictures,reading,play doh and gluing things onto a picture. It was her first experience with glue and scissors. She did great! We got there early and had a conversation with the principal.
Principal: "this your first time going to school Diana?"
Diana: "Yes. My new cats name is Merlin."
Principal "thays a great name. I have a cat to. He's 16 years old."
Diana; " well I'm 4 years old."

Then when we went in and met the 2 teachers Diana held out her hand and said: "i have pretend apples for you." I think she's going to have a great time when she starts in the fall. Yes I'm sad she's growing up so fast but I'm glad that she's going to have fun. She's going to make so many new friends.

Last night finally got to take my mom to see Star Trek. She loved it. It was our annual 1 movie a year. Before 2007 my mom and i hadnt seen a movie in 9 years. In 2007 we saw Live Free Or Die Hard and in 2008 Indiana Jones and The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull. So we are on a roll now.

Did a little bit of shopping before Kath had to go to work. Bought the first issue of the new Batman and Robin series. Seriously no one predicted Dick Grayson would be the new Batman? Kath bought some Muppet comics. I'm hoping that gets her back into reading comics. We used to read all the same comics together but she got out of it. Oh well. At least i have my other comic book friend Nickle. Oh i should also point we also bought a lego Indiana Jones video game for 22.00$. Someone at the head office of the video game store put the wrong bar code on the game so we for it for 8.00$ cheaper. So thank you head office guy for f'ing up. Pleasure doing business with ya!

Kath just went to work. Gonna eat lunch and take a trip over to the park for a game of catch. We'll also try and get some bike practice in to. Anyhow hope everyone is having a great day. Talk to you soon

Jay

Dead Man Walking

Wow. I had an interesting day. SO i broke one of the big rules at work. I let a customer get under my skin. I picked a great time to do it to. My manager,operations manager and head office were listening in. I realized this in the final moments of the call. TO be fair the customer was a real asshole-a fact my operation manager agreed with. He started being rude from the minute i asked him his name. Eventually i had enough and kinda started arguing back with him. I don't know why i did this. I've certainly had worse calls then this one. I didn't even lose it on the guy that told me to burn in hell. He got me so mad i accidently gave him the wrong information about his servive. As soon as i saw there were other people listening in i appologized. Dick wouldnt even accept my appology. I hung up the phone and i started to feel sick to my stomach. Not two minutes later i was told to go to the operation managers office and wait for her. I followed the manager and felt like i was on death row, Outta the way dead man walkin' here. I sat in the office for a good 15 minutes. I was very nervous and my heart was pounding. What was going to happen? I've never been on a corrective action before. Being alone in the office i started thinking all kinds of crazy thoughts. Would i be fired? How would i provide for my family? Would i have to work the streets? Finaly the operations manager came in followed by the lady that marks the calls. THey could tell i was rattled and immediately told me my job wasnt in jeopardy and i wouldnt be put on corrective action.They were actually really cool about it. They said i had a clean record and they've never had a problem with me before. I was told to just be cool when customers started going off on me especially at 3:30 on a Tuesday when the head office is listening in. Head office actually told them to get me off the phones immediately. They let me chill out anothe 15 minutes just bullshitting about other idiot customers. Also,i guess i wasnt the first person that they had to pull into the office for going off on a customer today. I was actually number 4! Anyhow next time a customer pisses me off I'm going to think of funny things. Like lines from Kevin Smith movies or funny things Diana might have said.

To top my shitty afternoon off after i got back from my final break i noticed a huge rip in the sleeve of my shirt. What the hell? I just got the shirt a couple months ago and it was fine when i left the house today. I don't have a clue when it ripped. I also busted my sunglasses the other night. It just isnt my week i tell ya. Well i just have one more day to go before i get a day off. I can do it. I hope.

Goodnight my angel time to close your eyes

Ok after that long ass bitter entry i will quickly tell you about Diana's goodnight to me. It was really cute. For the first time ever she was cool with Hesh the cat sleeping in her room. Unfortunately since he has been kicked out of her room so many times,Hesh followed me out of the room. i told Diana i loved her and she asked me if i loved Hesh.
" Of course i love Hsh and i love mommy and Merlin to"
"well i love mommy and i love you and i love hesh and i love merlin and i love Becca and i love nick and i love morgan and i love jameson and i love fairies and characters too!"

Leave it to my kid to cheer me up after an awful day. Goodnight everybody

All I want from tomorrow is to get it better than today

So the other night Rob was curious as to why I've never mentioned going to college for broadcasting. I didn't finish the course and its really a sore spot for me. I was thinking about it all day. So I'm going to vent a bit. Bear with me as i ramble.

So in 1989 i went to Niagara College for broadcasting. The first year was the best. I had an awesome teacher. His name was Mr Johnson,an older gentleman but he was very cool. So everyday our class would run our college radio station in the afternoon. We would take turns doing all the jobs of a radio station-writing the news,reading the news,writing commercials and the big one-getting to be the on air personality. We would get marked out of 100 for the job we did- and i will brag a bit-i got high marks everyday in that class. i loved programming the music. For a little college station that no one heard outside of the college they had an amazing record library. I once spent 3 hours in there to do a play list and i swear they had thousands of singles. They had to have every single made in the 70's and 80's. It was the coolest. Still have some of the playlists i wrote up. Anyhow to sum up,the first year was the best and i did well and it was a great time.

This brings us to the second year. During the summer the guy they had teaching the 2nd year class quit. He was replaced by a guy who actually dj'ed at a station up north. Little did i know he was soon to become my Lex Luthor. His name was Cliff. I remember that because i wanted him to jump off his name. So my first bad encounter with Dj Douche. I arrived 5 minutes late for class one day. So i believe i was writing the news that day. At the end of the class he graded me. He went on to tell me what an awesome job i did but he was giving me a big fat zero for the day. What the hell? He explained i was five minutes late so i deserved a zero. If this was a real radio station i would have been fired. Well it wasnt a real radio station it was a class. He said we agreed that if anyone was late they would get a zero. To this day i don't remember that conversation. I remember we all agreed that if we missed class we should get a zero. Whatever.

A few weeks later i was late again. The teacher was late to and walked in at the same time as me. Ok if he was also late i thought i was in the clear. Not so. I got another zero and the same if this was a real radio station speech. Now i was geting pissed. If he would have told me at the beginning of the class that i was going to get a zero i would have just left and not worked so hard.

So lets talk about how he killed the record library. The asshole got rid of the entire library except for maybe twenty singles. It sucked. He got all kinds of free cd singles from his old radio station that for some reason he also refused to play.

Then came the day that i first got on the air in the second year. I was doing awesome. I was amazed that a Huey Lewis single made it onto the playlist. It was the song Jacobs Ladder which was actually a number one hit for him. Cool i would play that and i talked about hom much i admired his music. So i put the song on and was getting stuff ready for the broadcast. All of a sudden the door bursts open. in storms Cliff who is really angry at this point. I'll never forget the conversation.

"what the hell do you think you're doing?"
"my show?"
"who told you to play this record!!"
"it was in the pile,the guy that made the playlist gave it to me"
"i made this weeks playlist!!!"
"Ok then i was playing what was given to me."
"i wanted you to play the other side of the single!"
"the b side?"
"yes"
"but the a side was a number one song and the b side is a live version of an earlier hit. Why would i play the b side?"
I'm sorry big time dj or not i think i knew more about Huey Lewis than he did.
"you better watch yourself!" with that he left. So i was left really confused. Oh and because i played the "wrong song" i also failed that weeks class.

Next time i was on the air my first year teacher came in and told me what a great job i was doing and that he actually recorded my shows to play to his first year class because they were so funny. Man i missed the guy and wished he would punch Cliff in the balls for me.

So the second year was a horrible experience and the bastard gave me a failing grade. It didnt matter- after that year i didnt want to go back anyhow. Thus ended my short broadcasting carreer. I later found out that cliff had been fired but by that time the damage was done. Screw him. On my last day i swiped 2 Barney Bentall cd singles that he got from his old radio station. That was my experience and i really dont like to talk about it that much. It still makes me mad thinking about it 18 years later. So Rob sorry i didnt tell you about it. Cliff was an ass and maybe if i'm lucky he was hit by a bus. Cheers!

WTF?

So on a more horrible than usual day at work several things came to mind that made me ask wtf? First of a lady called in mad that she didnt get a $9.00 promotion for HBO. I couldnt find that promotion but did find one that was better a $5.00 promo. So thats 4 dollars better right? Problem solved right? Wrong. She was still insisting she get the original 9 dollar promo. As a matter of fact i had to get a supervisor over that. Wtf? Moron.

So last night we watched the mtv movie awards. Twilight won every award. I know it was only the mtv movie awards but really? Twilight was better than The Dark Knight and Iron man? Wtf? And the lead actors from that film just seemed pissed off every time the camera panned over to them. I still don't get what everyone sees in that movie.

Last night Rob and Nicole came over. While it was good to see them,they brought the weirdest video game over. It was like guitar hero but with marracas. Marraca hero? There was all kinds of characters in the back ground. Many of them mexican. Except for 2 leprauchans and a pickle dressed in a thong? Wtf? And the soundrack included the Rocky theme. When i think of mexico i think of Rocky Balboa.

Lastly read something that didnt make sense to me on the inter web. So theres going to be a Tomb Raider 3. Cool enough. I liked the first 2 Tomb Raider movies a lot. Not a huge Angelina Jolie fan but she suited the part and she was really cool in it. Apparently she won't be back in part 3. She was told she was too old. Wtf? Too old? She's younger than me and still in great shape. She was so hot i mean good in those films. Man they'll probably cast someone retarded like Lindsay Lohan.

And that my friends is what is making me wonder wtf on this glorious Monday. Talk to you soon.